Stress management guidance for WTC workers, Sept 2001

6ZETPLOOO OLM-OAN Be REGIONAL Wednesday, September 12, 2001 THE DalLy GAZETTE Parents must talk to kids about tragedy: experts By JUDY PATRICK Gazette Reporter Whatever you do, talk to your kids. That was the message for par- ents from local child: psycholo- gists following Tuesday’s catas- ‘trophes in New York City and Washington. “It's much better for children to get this information first-hand from people they love and trust,” said Melissa Doyle, a pediatric social worker at Albany Medical College. “It’s more scary and orrisome when it comes from "Sme other sources.” 3) parents should also tryto keep We children's lives as tiormal as possible, a sense of normalcy that should help reassure them, said George Nevulis, a school psy- chologist at Burnt Hills-Ballston Lake Central School. That's the approach most schools took Tuesday as news of the terrorist attacks unfolded. Lessons were taught, lunch was eaten and recess was enjoyed. “The idea is to keep things as normal as possible,” Nevulis said. Doyle agreed, saying that con- tinuing on with family life, school and other activities are valuable ways of letting children know their world will go. “It’s a reas- surance to the child that they are truly safe, that the adults are in charge and in control,” she said. Children of different ages need’ to hear different things. “It’s much better for children to get this information first-hand from people they love and trust.” ; ; Melissa Doyle Albany Medical College pediatric social worker Preschoolers are beginning to Older children, those 8 to 10 develop a better concept of the world, including its potential dangers. But their thinking is still colored by the possibility that magic or wishes can change reali- ty. “Parents should be very brief, clear and direct, and not offer a whole lot of detail,” Doyle said. “It should be very brief, accom- panied by a lot of reassurance ... about their safety and the people they care about.” years old, will likely ask a lot of questions as they seek a logical explanation for what happened. “They'll ask why this happened, or why are people angry at the government,” Doyle said. And while children of this age are pri- marily searching for information, they need reassurance that they’re safe as well. “You want to allow them some room to do some of their own thinking,” she said. Parents should answer questions as best they can, and shouldn't be afraid to admit they don’t have all the answers. “The important thing is to get a conversation started about how these things can occur,” she said. Doyle cautions against directly exposing very young children to intense media coverage of the event. Most children have some level of exposure to TV violence, particularly via cartoons. But the real images could be disturbing, even difficult for them to process, she said, adding that parents should consequently watch TV alongside their children. .And parents should be careful about how they react to the un- folding events. Too extreme of a reaction often sends a message to children that something has hap- pened that they need to be wor- ried about. Teen-agers are developing their own sense of identify, less linked with their family and more with their friends. “But it’s still important for parents and other important adults to be engaging them in discussion, to allow them to voice their own opinions,” Doyle said. Children who have already faced some tragedy in their lives — a fire, a car accident, for exam- ple — may be more likely to be af- fected, Doyle said. Those kinds of events in the past often make children more sensitive, she said. JUSWNDO |EWO_d JI/GNd 11/6 OAN